Valentines
Ode To My Valentines: Is Christ Enough?
So, it’s almost Valentine’s Day again. I am not real sure where this holiday came from or to what real purpose it serves.
But I figure this would be a great time to discuss something so many Christians are intrigued by these days…finding loving, lasting fulfillment. Now, where do we typically find this kind of fulfillment? I’m sure most of you threw out the most commonly used, Sunday-school answer of “Jesus.” Now most of us know God alone satisfies us spiritually, but do we really believe that God can fulfill us in every way: emotionally, physically, mentally, and dare I say, sexually, if we are single? (Dang, that was a lot of commas) Hmmm…have you ever thought about that? I’m not writing this to persuade you to think like me, or to follow some sort of formula…my thinking is flawed and incomplete because I’m human, and formulas never do work when applied to living the Christian life as 2,000 years of church history will attest to. I just want you to think for yourself…but in accordance with how God tells us we will find fulfillment. After all, He is the creator, patent-holder, manufacturer, and distributor of the entire human race…I think He might know best how our lives should run to gain maximum fulfillment and performance. If you like true stories and you feel inclined to ponder this question, read on.
I recently had lunch with a friend of mine whom I hadn’t spoken with in quite some time. We were catching up on life and all its trappings, and then the subject changed to a dear mutual friend of ours. She went on to tell me that our friend, who had been engaged and about 1 month away from her wedding day, had broken off everything due to some recent discoveries in her fiancés character…major things of which I wasn’t privy to hear about. When I heard this, I was shocked to say the least. I knew this couple fairly well and to hear such news broke my heart. I left lunch that day and went home immediately to write an email to encourage my heavy-hearted friend. She later replied back thanking me for the encouragement as she was grieving the loss of this relationship. I know many women who, given the same set of circumstances, would tend to ‘over-look’ some major flaws in their man because of how badly they want to be married. This dear friend of mine is now serving the Lord in a ministry that is perfect for her passions, desires, and skills. Her life is now impacting many for the cause of Christ and His kingdom…the kind of impacts that last an eternity! God has honored her decision by rewarding her with a fulfilling mission and purpose. She is finding her true fulfillment in Christ and all that He is doing in and through her.
I also have another friend who I see from time to time, and he is a newly wed. We were having breakfast (yes, I love to eat…there’s just something special about ‘breaking bread’ with others) one day and the subject of conversation turned towards his recent marriage and how it was going. He started to persuade me to stay single for a while and to be very careful about whom I do decide to marry if I do come to that fork in the road. I went on to ask him why he was saying this. With a hint of sadness in his eyes, he went on to tell me about how he realized he had rushed in to marriage as opposed to listening to wise counsel and giving it some time. He told me he realized that there were certain things he wanted to do with his life…dreams and desires to serve that he said the Lord had placed in his heart; now he will most likely not be able to do them to the extent he would like, if at all. He was finding out how difficult marriage really is…that it isn’t some ‘heavenly sex-romp’ where ‘getting along’ just happens naturally. He is discovering how love is a daily, sacrificial choice. Is he growing spiritually through this? Of course. But he purpose of the Christian life is not to just ‘grow,’ but rather to become impactful for the Kingdom. This is a perfect segue to my point.
One person was finding her fulfillment in Christ alone and had to forfeit her marriage for now. But she is discovering more of her passions and desires in her purposes in Christ. The other, who is a dear brother in Christ, (self-admittedly) made a hasty decision to rush into marriage only to discover it wasn’t near as fulfilling as he had made it out to be. He is realizing that there is much that he will not be able to do simply for the fact that marriage brings on many new, primary responsibilities and duties that take away from absolute freedom to serve Christ in every way one could dream of.
If you were in either of their shoes, what would you do? Are you fulfilled enough in Christ alone that you could make the tough choice to pass up marriage for a season, or do you think marriage will bring something to you that you never could find in Christ?
Where do you find your fulfillment? Do you find it in affirmation from the opposite sex? Do you find it in masturbation? Do you find it in online, pseudo-communities like Facebook or MySpace? Or can we truly find ALL fulfillment in Christ alone? Is it possible to live as a single Christian and not have to pursue marriage or masturbation to be fulfilled sexually?
I want to leave you with an awesome quote from a very wise lady friend of mine, “The same people who are miserable in marriage are the same ones who were miserable as singles.”
I hope each of you, whether single or married, truly find your fulfillment in Christ alone this Valentine’s Day. Let me know what you think…
About The Author
Jonathan Schrodt is not new to practicing theology. He wrote one of the most popular articles on this site that is still getting views to this day. He is a student at Criswell College, loves missions and someday wants to spend the rest of his life traveling from country to country planting churches.