Author: Robert
Funny: Jesus is a Friend of Mine
I don’t know whether to be ashamed or angry. But this is really funny and at the same time sad that Christians come up with stuff like this.
This was written back in the 80s. But I cannot help but think that we have our own modern day equivalent of this type of music. I will not name names. This video made me think about the current state of Christian music today. What do you think about the current state of Christian music? Good or bad? Let me know in the comments.
How To Be Moved
I have invited Jonathan back. His last article is one of the most popular articles on this site. His writing style seems to click with a few of you. So here goes and be sure to leave a comment on this one. Thanks!
For those of you who know me, you probably have heard that I have made a decision to move to a small town outside of Dallas to work at a men’s discipleship ministry called Kingdom Authority Ministries (K.A.M.).
You probably know my heart for missions and my heart for discipling men as well. What you probably don’t know is the thought process that went into this decision to uproot myself and move away from most everyone I know (how could you, you’re not in my head…that would be scary!).
Allow me to be more specific with what I’ll be involved with. I will be living in a facility called the “Bunkhouse” in the middle of nowhere, Texas. There are a few houses around, but all in all, it’s pretty much as far away from city-living you can get. There are horses and cattle that I will be helping care for as well as tending a garden. I hope you are getting the picture, because this is about as country as it gets.
In this house, we will be taking in men who have had “bad” backgrounds. What I mean, is that we are looking for any guys who are on the down and outs and want a life change. We are looking for the men who have been in and out of substance abuse, prison, marriages, or sin. This is free of charge to all who would come and be discipled.
The criteria we have are this:
~They have to contact us…not relatives, not friends, only themselves.
~They have to submit themselves to biblical teaching, authority, and training.
~They have to stay at least 6 months, but preferably longer if they so choose.
~They will be subject to random drug-testing and accountability.
My role is to live life with these guys. My room will share a wall with theirs. I will be eating with them, talking with them, listening to them; I am there to challenge, teach, rebuke, encourage, and above all else, continually point them to Christ and His Word.
Now some of you will wonder why I am doing this. Why would a single man, soon-to-be 29 years of age, and still a college student be willing or even wanting to move into a house in the middle of nowhere with a bunch of ‘bad apples’? It wasn’t a choice I made quickly or without prayer.
After returning from a short-term trip to Central Asia this summer, I received a call from a man who I had worked for a few times down in Midlothian, Texas. His name is Hugh Huber, and his life is an incredible story of God’s grace. I would love to spend all this time and space devoted to his story, but he is not the focus of this article.
Hugh was calling to see if I would be the guy to live with and help disciple these guys that would soon be coming to K.A.M. Even though this ministry does exactly what I hope and dream to one day do all across the world (disciple men to be leaders and disciple-makers), I really wanted to know if this was exactly what God would have me do. I knew this kind of thing doesn’t come around often, but on the flip side, I also realized that this would be one of the most difficult things I have ever done.
When Hugh approached me about this opportunity, I told him I would pray about it and that I would discuss it with my mentors and accountability group. After a few weeks, the more I thought about it, the more excited I became. I kept thinking, “How incredible would it be to challenge and live with men so they might one day become great leaders for Christ?” Even with the sacrifices I would have to make, I decided this was just too good of an opportunity to pass up. I decided to take another step in the process, and I asked my wise counsel to come with me to the Bunk House to check it out and meet Hugh. We all gathered on a Saturday morning and had breakfast together. During this time, we were able to chat and talk about Hugh’s heart and my heart and to weigh the pros and cons of going through with this.
After talking and praying, I decided that it would be just downright foolish to pass this up. I mean, here was an awesome opportunity to get involved and see the Lord work through me. Sure I would have a long commute to school. Sure I am probably not going to be able to pursue a relationship with a woman anytime soon. But this is exactly where my heart lies and it is a harder challenge than anything I had done before. I told Hugh I would do it right then and there, and he quickly ran over and gave me a giant, bear hug.
Now I will be living with guys from different and difficult pasts, and this might be one of the most perplexing and challenging parts of this experience. I will be living in unfamiliar territory, but I’m also excited to explore new areas. I will be away from many people that I have shared life with and grown close to over the last 3 to 4 years, but I also realize that I will have an eternity to celebrate with them. Now is the time for God to use me to change and impact the lives of others.
A very wise man once said, “If you want to witness a miracle, you have to become a participant.” God is constantly preparing the willing and sending out His own to do His bidding and be apart of what He is accomplishing. If we come to realize that we are most satisfied doing the work God has for us to do then no cost or price or sacrifice is too great to overcome.
Do we, as Jesus’ body, really believe that? Are the things that God has for us to do burdensome or rather the most amazing things in the world? Can I truly be fulfilled doing His will as opposed to my own? If we believe He is the creator, then He has to be the One who knows how I can truly be fulfilled.
My hope and prayer is that more of my brothers and sisters in Christ and realize that God is doing amazing things all around us…but if we are not in fellowship with Him, we will not know His will or that we could possibly be fulfilled by Him and the work He has for us. I challenge you, the reader, to surrender. I challenge you to seek a mature believer to walk through life with you and train you in the spiritual ways of Christ. I challenge you to stop squandering your life on vain and trifle purposes and to seek the One who can reveal the adventure of pursuing Christ.
Do you think it is true that we are most satisfied in life when we are doing the work God has for us? Speak out in the comment section below. Thanks.
About That Guy You Want To Date…
This is particularly directed at single women. One of the things I teach my guys about manhood is the importance of knowing the purpose God has for their lives. By that I generally mean the specific purpose that he has for an individual that explains how he is supposed to live out The Great Commission. My pastor echoed this same thing although his sermon was not specifically about this topic. The sermon was particularly directed at wives, but he had something to say to single women that I think is really important.
I have included the audio snippet below. For those of you who are not familiar with black slang, a “boo” is someone that you are romantically involved with such as a girlfriend/boyfriend or husband/wife.
I believe that a single man should have a purpose before he begins the dating process. This is critical, because I do not think that there is anything more risky in romantic relationships than to enter into one with a guy who has no clue what he is supposed to do with his life. So where do I get this idea, from Genesis 2. God gave Adam a purpose in putting him in the garden to cultivate it (Gen 2:15). Adam does not meet Eve until Gen. 2:23. The point is, Adam had a purpose before he met the woman. Missions should come before marriage. But I suspect some will say, “I did not know what I was going to do before I met my girlfriend/boyfriend and we discovered it together!” In other words, it works for them so why bother with such menial points in the Bible? But that misses the point. I understand that people don’t follow what I am suggesting and things turn out just fine. Again, that’s not the point. It’s not about what works but about following the design that God laid out. And I really believe that we save ourselves a lot of unnecessary headaches down the road if we make missions a greater priority than finding a wife/husband.
I strongly suggest that if the guy you’re interested in is not participating in the Great Commission, leave him alone. It is not your responsibility to help him figure that out.
Bottom line is that the only requirement the Bible has for Christians who marry is that they do not marry someone who is not a Christian (2 Cor. 6:14). Some are so desperate to be in a relationship they don’t care if they’re a Christian or not they just want them to be male. So why make such a hubbub about a man having a purpose before he finds the woman? Well, because its wise. Ladies, as someone who has discipled many young men between 18 and 24, I strongly suggest that if the guy you’re interested in is not participating in the Great Commission, leave him alone. It is not your responsibility to help him figure that out. If you date him, you will only distract him. Therefore the best thing you can do for him is to love him enough to let him go.
So ladies, “No purpose, no boo.”
A Pursuit in a Godly Direction
This week I have another guest writer for you. Her name is Camille Holland. She is recently married, and when she is not spending time with her new hubby (what up Matt!) she is experiencing the joy of disciping young college women. I asked Camille to come and talk to the guys I disciple last week and give her thoughts on what she thought was the most appropriate way for them to pursue a godly romantic relationship. The following article is a brief summary of that conversation. Thank you, Camille.
How do you talk to a group of college guys about dating relationships when you’re a post-graduate married woman? Well, it ain’t easy. I’d only been married for about eight months so I still knew what it tasted like to be single. I clearly remember the feelings of impatience and loneliness that I felt for so many years as I watched friend after friend get married. Now that I am married I still sympathize deeply with the heart of the single person. However, understanding the heart of a single man is much different from that of a single woman.
Single men today experience extreme pressure from the media and society to view relationships as either things to be conquered and counted or as an area where women do all the work. Even in Christian circles this mindset exists leading in part to the dysfunctionality of Christian relationships today. With that in mind, the ability for Christian college men to enter into Godly relationships must come from a Scriptural outlook and not society.
Matthew 22:37-39 is a good basis for our interactions in relationships. If we call ourselves Christians then we should admittedly affirm the first statement. As believers, man or woman, we should make our first goal in life to know and love God. Every behavior and thought flows from our belief and love for God. It is virtually impossible to really love our neighbor if we do not first love God. Likewise, it is virtually impossible for a Christian guy to enter into a godly relationship with a Christian girl without first knowing and loving God. Although it does happen, it will never be the relationship that God intended it to be unless he puts God first. But, how does he get to this point? How can he enter into a godly relationship by first loving God and then loving his neighbor?
1:Cultivate Your Relationship With God
The first step is to cultivate your relationship with God. This is done by intentionally setting aside time to get into God’s Word and spend time in prayer. Again, if we don’t know who God is then we can’t really love him and we can’t really love our neighbors. For men, pay special attention to the men of the Bible and how God used them to be leaders in relationships. For example, Joseph was a great fiancée and husband to Mary, the mother of Jesus. He protected her, stood by her side and chose to be an active part of her life.
2:Enter into a Discipleship Relationship
The second step is to enter into a discipleship relationship with another person or small group. For men and women discipleship is a key component in encouraging our spiritual growth and developing our relationships. A mentor or small group can see from the outside what your life looks like and how you behave in relationships. They can challenge you to grow in ways that might not be obvious to you. It is particularly important that the girl you wish to enter into a relationship with is also involved in a discipleship relationship with another person or small group.
3:Identify the Woman Through Observation
The third step is to identify the kind of woman that you would like to date. This can be done through a process called, observation. This process is not meant to mimic stalking but to quietly notice the woman’s heart and how she behaves around others. (Note: This step will be in direct contrast to the way society describes the start of relationships. Society will tell the man to jump right in and then decide how you feel about her the next morning.) The observation phase should begin as soon as you start thinking, “This is a cool girl, and I’d like to get to know her better.” It is meant to give you time to really decide if this is the girl you want to pursue. You do not need to say anything to this girl or make your intentions known. Just be a friend to her and observe. Important questions to ask during the observation phase are: does she love God and does she love others? Your answer to these questions will help you determine if she is the sort of girl you should pursue.
4:Pursue Her In A Godly Way
The fourth step is to pursue her in a Godly way. Pursuit is the initial step that is taken to get to know the girl better. It begins the moment you ask her out on a date. Once you’ve decided that the girl meets the above criteria then you can and should begin the pursuit phase. The ball is in your court so act responsibly. If you are not sure if you want to pursue her, DON’T. If you still have questions, WAIT. Relationships are tricky territory but, the way that you pursue gives her a clue into who you are and your character. Again, check out the Bible for some examples of how men pursued women. For example, Jacob pursued Leah for 7 years before he married her. I know that times are different but the same principles still apply.
The worst thing you can do to a girl is lead her on. Communicate to her how you feel and let her know the moment you start thinking that this is not going to work. If she has a discipleship relationship or small group around her then she will be fine. They will handle any negative feelings. If you are concerned about her well-being talk to her friends but leave her alone. Once you have stated that you are not interested back it up with action and give her some time to heal before attempting to restore the friendship.
Two New 53X Chapters Added
I just updated the 53X online book with two new chapters, “In The Beginning” and “Real Life”. Look for the remaining chapters to go online very soon.
You Will Not Grow Theologically If…
So I was visiting a blog that I recently started reading and found this great post titled "Top Ten Ways To Not Grow Theologically" and I had to share it with the 7 or so people who actually read this site. Ha!
I’m kidding. There’s at least 10 of you. Hope on over to the blog and read it because it is a prettty good list. I am going to share it with the guys I disciple because for those of you who know me understand that knowing theology is something that I feel is really important. Lives change as people grow in their theological understanding of God. This is why this site exists. Ok. So I’ve said enough. Go make sure you are not comitting any of the "ways" on this list.